Precious: Based On The Novel "Push" By Sapphire (2012)

Not the most motivational of movie stills, I reckon.

At a glance:

I had just seen Gabourey Sidibe's brief role in Seven Psychopaths (2012) and I thought I'd rehash this old review, on account of renewin my seethin dislike for the movie upon the very sight of her. Precious: Based On The Novel 'Push' by Sapphire (2009) is quite a mouthful for a movie title, so it's a small relief that this decorated Oscar fave does have somethin substantial to say. However, like the makers conceded and thanked production ally Oprah Winfrey at the 2009 Awards ("because you touched it, so everyone saw it"), we really have to wonder if this greatly divisive film isn't just another well-marketed product of white guilt internalisation.

Bad news on the doorstep:

Paula Patton lends her well-to-do looks for contrast.

Yes, the artistic merit of this drama does come into question, as the eponymous main character Claireece Precious Jones (Gabourey Sidibe) is an overweight, illiterate, impoverished and abused teenager who just happens to be surrounded by some of the nastiest people and also go through some of the worst experiences one possibly can growing up in black Harlem. It's the kind of character arc that invites empathy at first but then descends into a credibility problem. Not that we're contendin the nature of a grossly underprivileged life in the late 80s, but there is a difference between tellin a story about the black underclass and tellin a story about how the black underclass view themselves. This Lee Daniels picture is a clear case of the latter but instead of offerin any insight into the psyche of any one person who comes from such a background, it is evident by the final reels that Precious is an unreflective sob story that strives for some redeeming value that it cannot attain.

Perennial wonderment:

Mo'Nique, the monster of a mum. Figuratively and physically.

For a movie that has been called "con job of the year" to one that goes to the extent of "demeaning the idea of black American life", emotions run strong, especially since we can't call the filmmakers racist because they're black. Perhaps it's an instance of reverse racism that the horrendous story of Precious becomes such a celebrated film that has picked up close to 100 awards across film festivals and such. In any case, there is no denying that Mo'Nique's performance as an criminally-abusive mother is a powerful turn that deserves every award it gets, includin the most prized one - Best Supporting at the 82nd Academy Awards. The movie as whole features some compelling actin (Gabriel Sidibe, Paula Patton, Sherri Shepherd and even Mariah Carey), and that lends urgency and strength to the proceedings whatever you might feel about the story.

Reminds me of:

Don't know. Can't relate to much in this movie.

I can't remember if I cried:

When I saw the frazzled Mariah Carey role. It's a suitable role for her, admittedly. It's just that this isn't the woman I remember from the Christmas music videos and that depresses me, as if the story isn't movin along bad enough.

Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?

Emotionally manipulative in a way I don't care for. As a movie experience, you will have to watch Precious - but only if you want to discuss it with your friends, and not because you look forward to enjoying it. ★★

Killer Joe (2012)

Fried chicken fellatio. Trailer trash strippers. Bloodthirsty biker bailiffs.
Killer Joe has got 'em all.

At a glance:

The last time playwright Tracy Letts and director William Friedkin got together, it was for the schizo sci-fi Bug (1996). More accessible than that genre-bender is Killer Joe (2012), a slick little shocker that goes OTT with some dark humour, havin been described as Larry Clark doin a Red Rock West (1993) to Coen brothers crime caper with a Pulp Fiction (1994) gloss-over. Having failed the NC-17 appeal, the peculiar trailer they cut hints little towards the violent hicksploitation this is; and the movie may have proved even harder to market without its comfortable star draw. We follow the titular Joe Cooper (Matthew McConaughey), a bent NYPD cop who accepts a contract to kill the estranged, good-for-nothin mother of the dysfunctional Smith family comprisin of deadbeat son Chris (Emile Hirsch), sexpot stepmum Sharla (Gina Gershon), halfwit redneck dad Ansel (Thomas Haden Church) and daughter Dottie (Juno Temple) - the nubile virgin who ends up bein the collateral when the deal goes awry. Everyone is at some point or another either naked, half-naked or bathed in blood. Fire up the chicken and let the good times roll.

Bad news on the doorstep:

Juno Temple takes it all off for Killer Joe.

While it's easier to dismiss the complaints that are based on mismatched genre expectations, I seem to have shaken off the post-screenin euphoria to discover that this is ultimately a pointless, though entertainin film. It's also easy to echo At A Theater Near You's Chris Pandolfi in havin to recognise the film's technical merits and strong performances but Variety's Justin Chang hammered it home by questionin its raison d'etre to arrive at the lingerin feelin that this is some kind of inside joke - "a mostly well-done adaptation that never quite convinces you it was worth doing well in the first place". Somehow Clarence Carter's vulgar 1977 hit Strokin', a theme in the movie, makes us all feel a little played indeed.
Perennial wonderment:

It's only been six years but Juno Temple is certainly on the up and up; and it seemed so long ago since she first appeared as Cate Blanchett's annoyin teen daughter in Notes On A Scandal (2006). She might have landed the job here only because not many actresses agree to full frontals (ditto Gina Gershon, albeit with beaver wig), but her intercontinental brand of slightly sexual ferocity has seen her held her own in The Dark Knight Rises (2012), Kaboom (2010), The Other Boleyn Girl (2008), The Three Musketeers (2011), Wild Child (2008) and Dirty Girl (2010). Here in Killer Joe, she's 10 years older than the 13-year-old jailbait she's supposed to be for McConaughey's paedo cop but the young lady does command some screen presence, whether she's doin a standup doggie for him or aimin a gun to his head. Too bad Chloë Grace Moretz is still only 15, you can hear the paedos concur. Will look forward to seein her The Brass Teapot (2012) next.
Reminds me of:
Sidney Lumet's Before The Devil Knows You're Dead (2007) and the Coens' Blood Simple (1984). Killer Joe is only the most recent in Friedkin's very varied 16-film oeuvre, which includes films like The Exorcist (1973) and Cruising (1980).

I can't remember if I cried:

The fried chicken fellatio. Killer Joe will forever be best remembered for an act of sadistic misogyny so degradin even Gina seen-all done-all Gershon looks genuinely humiliated. Very nice. Charmin McConaughey, the quintessential Texan talent, never acted better accordin to many, but it's also funny to read to that director Billy Friedkin says the man didn't even get it when he first read the script!

Most memorable line:

Thomas Haden Church: "I've never had a thousand dollars all my life."

Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?

Thanks to Rue Morgue for the Scotiabank Theatre screenin in Toronto but now I feel guilty that the film's Twitter handle had retweeted my earlier one-sentence review praisin this as "vulgar, pulpy, pointless and chicken-sucking good". It's much closer to the chicken poutine I had prior to the show - a mess of instant, in-your-face, gratifyin gravy that you'd live to reconsider the mornin after.★★1/2
Bonus material:
"Totally twisted, deep-fried, Texas redneck, Billy Friedkin-directed, NC-17-rated, trailer park murder story masterpiece" as marketed on its Facebook page. Go check it out - they do have some funny photo mash-ups there.

The Help (2011)

At a glance:

You is kind, you is smart and you is the fool who watched this craptacular con job on the back of its Oscars hype. If you're the type of tosser who thinks Slumdog Millionaire (2008) and Precious: Based On The Novel Push By Sapphire (2009) are wonderful eye-openin films, chances are you'll have heaps of praises for The Help (2011), yet another glossy melodrama that White America Hollywood endorses to feel better about itself, just like The Blind Side (2009). Do not be part of this cocksuckin collective. Give "magical negro" a Google today. This movie is about helpless black people who are empowered by white people - that's why they're tellin you it's the dog's bollocks.

Bad news on the doorstep:

Film director Tate Taylor's The Help (2011) isn't based on a true story and the neither is the eponymous 2009 Kathryn Stockett novel it's based on, although some maid tried to sue her for it. Both Taylor and Stockett are actually childhood friends - coprophiliacs, if bizarre plot elements are anythin to go by. Both book and movie are objectionable materials with outrageous or extraneous characters that trivialise race relations and human dignity. Make no mistake, it is fiction. Story is about a well-meanin white journo (Emma Stone) who published tell-all stories from maligned African-American home servants (hence the title) in 60s Jackson, Mississippi. It's the kind of prepackaged socio-political content that drags you through deplorable aspects of the human condition and then leave you with absolutely no room to draw your own conclusions. If not because of the admittedly all-round solid performances (especially Octavia Spencer, pic, from TV's Ugly Betty, playin a motor-mouthed maid), this movie wouldn't get half the attention it's been gettin.
Perennial wonderment:
Jessica Chastain (pic) reportedly put on 15 pounds for her role as ditzy, alabaster housewife Celia Foote, thanks to soymilk and ice-cream. How did it all go to just her boobs? It was apparently upped two cup sizes if you saw her in that red dress, unrecognisable from the girl we saw in The Debt (2010).

Reminds me of:

Stephen King horror movie Thinner (1996), the last time so much fuss is kicked up over a piece of pie.

Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?

Overrated, overlong, overdone. If it were more like Forrest Gump (1994) and didn't take itself so seriously, then perhaps not many would've opposed it so badly. Reverse racism is so borin. Go and fry yourself some chicken instead to feel better about life.★★1/2