Seven Psychopaths (2012)

Will Woody Harrelson ever play a sweet, charming, leading man?

Leggy Olga Kurylenko at the TIFF 2011 premiere.

At a glance:

You will finish writin a screenplay if your screenplay is about the difficulty in writin a screenplay. That's the almost meta-movie that came out of Martin McDonagh's mind (In Bruges, 2008) - a bizarre Tarantinoesque tale generously dipped in dark humour, ostensibly less fun than the recent Killer Joe (2012) but more heart than say, Rubber (2010) or Hit And Run (2012). It's the kind of movie you're dyin to like as soon as you see the poster or watch the trailer. Hymen-thin plottin revolves around three central characters - alcoholic scriptwriter Marty (Colin Farrell), his maligned friend Billy (Sam Rockwell) and an peculiar old guy named Hans (Christopher Walken). The latter two run a small time dognapping syndicate and cowboy mobster Charlie (Woody Harrelson) just happens to have a missin shih tzu. Part of the joy of such a movie is watchin the characters enter, so I'll spare you the mazy ensemble minutiae.

Bad news on the doorstep:

One of many memes on the official Seven Psychopaths Facebook page.

All the scenes cut a pretty picture and if viewed on their own separately, look as if they're from the next Pulp Fiction (1994). Variety's Peter Debruge argues that ironically enough, the McDonagh's "apparent lack of any attempt to make a grand artistic statement could easily make this outing his most accessible project to date". It's definitely easy on the eyes with such a handsome cast - I'm one of those who'd pay good money just to see Christopher Walken walk a dog. However, while this juicy project is not short of energy or violence, its charm pivots on your empathy with the characters; and this is purposefully manipulated to reward and frustrate your expectations at every turn. That is to say, the movie wrote itself to the finishin line, to hell with the audience. 
Perennial wonderment:
Talk about gettin even. Never cared for Colin Farrell but here's somethin interestin for you - apparently Mickey Rourke dropped out of this because he had a problem with the director and Woody Harrelson took his role. In the movie, there's a tombstone with Rourke's name on it. Recently, it was reported that Rourke tweeted about how we shouldn't watch the movie because it's unwatchable and a waste of time. Ha!

Reminds me of:

You know how Machete (2010) was the unlikely end product of a fake Tarantino trailer that was picked up on? I got a feelin one of the stories in the caper could do with one of those. It's the one about a Vietnamese priest.

Harry Dean Stanton

I can't remember if I cried:

When Olga Kurylenko appeared for just the duration of which it takes you to say her name. Cheated! In fact, Kurylenko, Abbie Cornish and Gabourey Sidibe probably had just 10 minutes screen time between them.

Most memorable line:

Next to an inspired five minutes of  Sam Rockwell catharsis near the end, the Gandhi joke in the trailer is the best moment of the movie for me. In fact, it's that tone of humour that permeates throughout the movie.

Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?

It's strange that my wife enjoyed it more than me. I guess I wanted it to be a new spin on The Usual Suspects (1995) or somethin like that. Seven Psychopaths (2012) begs you to go crazy with it but I reckon only half of are willin and a further half of that are able.★★1/2
Bonus material:

You know what the annoying thing is?
Not all seven of the actors are the so-called psychopaths! Sheesh.

The Book Of Eli (2010)

"Are you sure you're 18?"

At a glance:
The end may be nigh but not for post-apocalyptic movies. Denzel Washington's survivor feature is a well-contained, half-engagin, action drama best commended for not resortin to the all-too-easy wasteland CGI we've been seein too much lately in movies like 2012 and I Am Legend. Directin it are the Hughes twins (From Hell, Menace II Society) who give the picture an ashen sepia feel all throughout Eli's decimated dystopia, an illiterate world populated with rummagin cannibals and Mad Max characters. While the picture isn't particularly rich nor does it have too many cultural references, Book Of Eli is steady and focused, just like the titular journeyman who has been walkin West for 30 years carryin the last bible on Earth (which happens to be a KJV, gimme a break!) and villainous town elder Carnegie (Gary Oldman) has set his eyes on it. Joinin the story are loyal concubine Claudia (Jessica Beals, Flashdance) and her bratty-but-seekin daughter Solara (Mila Kunis, That '70s Show). Other notable appearances include Tom Waits (Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus) and Malcolm McDowell (A Clockwork Orange).
Bad news on the doorstep:
Strange co-producer Washington has to play a restrained, charmless hero here, when the story could have benefited with an anti-hero or villain who trash-talks, somethin he's more adept at doin in movies like Training Day and American Gangster; or an outright, desperate good guy in movies like John Q and Fallen. The direction doesn't allow for his powerhouse actin and nobody watchin this film for him would be pleased with the experience because the movie doesn't really need him at all. Despite a solid premise, the correspondin lack of engaging dialogue between all characters is apparent.
Reminds me of:
Haneke's Time Of The Wolf and a bit of that entertainin flop Waterworld.
Watch out for:
Details!
Most memorable line:
One of the few rare moments of humour in the film when Eli is asked about whether he's quotin the bible and answers: "No, it's Johnny Cash. Live at Folsom Prison."
Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?
Three stars. A missed opportunity but studio suits won't bein a hurry to shout remake or sequel, which would be a good progression. The last shot with Mila Kunis does make her look like a leaner Angelina Jolie playin Terminator's Sarah Connor.

The Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus (2009)

"I am to die and Johnny Depp, Colin Firth and Jude Law are to take my place.
Haha. Must be a joke."

At a glance:
What a mouthful. The unquiet mind of Monty Python's Terry Gilliam has done it again. While Imaginarium is definitely more accessible than his Piano Tuner Of Earthquakes in 2005 (an impossible movie for most to understand, though it is rather beautiful), the project lacks the energy of his other works like Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas (1998) and will go down in the books mostly for being Heath Ledger's last appearance on the big screen. Not that it's not worth a watch. If anythin, the unfortunate death of Aussie star Heath Ledger (pic) this time last year has improved the movie, as the good director has been tellin the press that "the movie made itself" when initially he thought it was good as dead. Recruitin only friends of Ledger (Johnny Depp, Colin Firth and Jude Law, as adjudicated by Gilliam) to shoot the bits that he didn't get to complete, you know this movie wasn't easy to make, especially when you read that Depp had to cram all his scenes into just one day due to his attachment to Public Enemies (2009) at the time.

Verne Troyer

Perennial wonderment:
There are reports that Ledger was monkeyin about in a scene and the director said to him: "I know what you're doin... you're doin Johnny Depp!" How strange it must have felt for Depp when he learned this. The two do have similar qualities, don't they?
I can't remember if I cried:
When Ledger's character changes face for the first time, to Depp's. The character is Tony, a mysterious drifter who joins a nomadic theatre troupe led by the titular doctor (octogenarian Christopher Plummer, still recognisable as the captain in Sound Of Music). The old man is like an immortal eastern mystic and we learn he has made a deal with the devil (singer-songwriter Tom Waits) so together with dwarf assistant (Verne Troyer, who else?), illusionist Anton (Andrew Garfield, Boy A) and beautiful daughter Valentina (busty model Lily Cole), they must work to reverse a certain arrangement.

God knows what's goin on here.

Most memorable line:
Maybe this was the problem. I don't remember any lines. Just a lot of talkin.
Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?
Like all of Gilliam's works, The Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus is impressive with a chance of engrossin, but operates at a wavelength beyond those whose appreciation for fantasy don't fall too far from, say Lord Of The Rings. Watchin Gilliam is like watchin Lynch and Burton at the same time. Well, at least we can respect old hand Gilliam for stickin to his integrity. After all, he did reportedly snub Tom Cruise when approached for one of the three replacement roles.★★ 1/2