Saturday, 27 October 2012

Lizzie (2012)

Shawna Waldron and Gary Busey in a deceptively strong promo visual.

Brianna Lee Johnson
At a glance:
19th century New England axe murderer Lizzie Andrew Borden gets yet another run-out with Dark Morgue Picture's Lizzie (2012), as Leif Holt saw fit to produce, write and star in a rather unpersuasive B-movie that is both feeble and frustatin at the same time. I scarcely thought there was gonna be a worse movie than The Devil Inside this year but this does manage a close finish. We get a prologue about the oft-chronicled titular terror with montage and poem, then we're thrust into the modern day with a young blonde being treated by her shrink for witnessing apparitions around her house. 
Bad news on the doorstep:
So bad was this movie, when the characters are watchin a movie in their livin room, they put on a bad movie as well. Stop-start tension, bad CGI choices, continuity boo-boos, very poor performances - all these add to the derivative drivel. Foggy mirrors, disappearin blood... what else? Corbin Bernsen plays a shrink but comes across more like a garbage man who just walked on set and Leif Holt himself has a puzzlin role as a feckless boyfriend.
Let's watch a bad movie!
Perennial wonderment:
Apparently there's been development on the case just a few months ago. Anyway the canon of Lizzie Borden feature films include The Legend of Lizzie Borden (1975), The Curse of Lizzie Borden (2006) and The Curse of Lizzie Borden 2: Prom Night (2008), not to mention several documentaries like Lizzie Borden: A Century of Fascination (1992) and Lizzie Borden Had an Axe (2004). Never saw any meself but this 2012 movie sure doesn't provide much encouragement.
How I felt in the movie, too.
Reminds me of:
Lead star Amanda Baker (Jolene Crowell on TV's General Hospital) is an extremely annoyin actress whose laughable lack of depth is made up for by her resemblance to Maria Bello, Jessica Biel and porn star Kagney Lynn. No nudity from her either.
Watch out for:
Veteran porn star Aurora Snow is supposed to have an appearance here, accordin to the credits. Must've ended up on the cuttin room floor because I don't remember this at all. Someone drop me a note if you know different.
Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?
The kind of movie you'd switch off or walk out on. Check out the official website and Facebook page if you're still readin.1/2
Bonus material:
Fast forward to this scene with Amanda Baker screaming. Hilarious.