Mama (2013)

The chameleonic Jessica Chastain. Almost as hot as Gemma Arterton, I'd say.

The Modigliani behind Mama?

At a glance:

It's only by pure happenstance and not my licentious fascination with Jessica Chastain since The Help (2011) that the first two movies I've paid to watch in cinemas this year both star her - Kathryn Bigelow's laborious Zero Dark Thirty (2013) and the del Toro-championed Mama (2013). Yes, I didn't care for the overlong, over-informative trailer (why are they like this nowadays!) but was in the mood for somethin that will do what it says on the tin. Muschietti siblings Andrés and Barbara return to expand on their 2008 short film of the same name (unless you count the accent in Mamá), the spooky three-minute success that got this picture made. The final product is this polished Spanish-Canadian effort - one of the better mainstream supernatural horror movies on wide release in recent memory. It's about two sisters who are rescued from a life of cherry-chompin in the woods by their uncle but a malevolent spirit follows them home. You get a little 19th century backstory thrown in. Strange to find Chastain in the lightweights here. Might've been a moodier, less distractin picture if it were a more obscure actress playin her part as the sympathetic rocker chick aunt figure, innit?

Bad news on the doorstep:

While the strength here is definitely the teasin delay in finally seein the offendin titular mother, I'm still not a fan of these digitalised spooks. However we ought to judge the player based on where he plays. For a movie with so much important CG, it is great CG; and even the protracted and over-exposed CG finale does not undo the tense, solid plottin throughout. That's what you call a sold audience.

Everyone overreacts to moths in horror movies. Why?

Perennial wonderment:

Could've done without the overused contorted human crawl, though. How many times do we have to see that spider shyte? Bleugh. By the way, Mama over-performed in its openin weekend and in just three days earned more than producer Guillermo del Toro's last movie Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark in its entire run. Poor Arnie died takin his last stand, you can read. Box Office Mojo reported: "Aside from the advantages inherent to the supernatural horror genre, Mama also benefited from a strong marketing effort and a PG-13 rating that managed to attract younger females in strong numbers: Mama's audience was 61% female and 63% under the age of 25. They awarded it a 'B-' CinemaScore, which is slightly above-average for a horror movie."

Most memorable line:

www.sadmoviequotes.tumblr.com

Nikolaj Coster-Waldau

Watch out for:
Megan Charpentier and Isabelle Nélisse as the impoverished, feral sisters. Well coached and well done. The male lead, Danish 'Aragorn' Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, has left his biggest callin card for Hollywood, I hope, with his largest part to date. Maybe he'll get to play a romantic lead in a Hollywood rom-com some day? Saw him most recently in the superb Norwegian crime-caper Headhunters (2011).

Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?

Nothin terribly original here but the production design of the ghoul is effective and its measured narrative enable us to enjoy the old school jumps instead of deridin them. Apparently in a video interview, the Muschiettis revealed that the eventual Mama Blu-ray could have up to 40 minutes of deleted scenes. I'd like to see that; and judgin from the box office collections and the way the movie ends, will wait for a sequel.★★★1/2
Bonus material:

The Help (2011)

At a glance:

You is kind, you is smart and you is the fool who watched this craptacular con job on the back of its Oscars hype. If you're the type of tosser who thinks Slumdog Millionaire (2008) and Precious: Based On The Novel Push By Sapphire (2009) are wonderful eye-openin films, chances are you'll have heaps of praises for The Help (2011), yet another glossy melodrama that White America Hollywood endorses to feel better about itself, just like The Blind Side (2009). Do not be part of this cocksuckin collective. Give "magical negro" a Google today. This movie is about helpless black people who are empowered by white people - that's why they're tellin you it's the dog's bollocks.

Bad news on the doorstep:

Film director Tate Taylor's The Help (2011) isn't based on a true story and the neither is the eponymous 2009 Kathryn Stockett novel it's based on, although some maid tried to sue her for it. Both Taylor and Stockett are actually childhood friends - coprophiliacs, if bizarre plot elements are anythin to go by. Both book and movie are objectionable materials with outrageous or extraneous characters that trivialise race relations and human dignity. Make no mistake, it is fiction. Story is about a well-meanin white journo (Emma Stone) who published tell-all stories from maligned African-American home servants (hence the title) in 60s Jackson, Mississippi. It's the kind of prepackaged socio-political content that drags you through deplorable aspects of the human condition and then leave you with absolutely no room to draw your own conclusions. If not because of the admittedly all-round solid performances (especially Octavia Spencer, pic, from TV's Ugly Betty, playin a motor-mouthed maid), this movie wouldn't get half the attention it's been gettin.
Perennial wonderment:
Jessica Chastain (pic) reportedly put on 15 pounds for her role as ditzy, alabaster housewife Celia Foote, thanks to soymilk and ice-cream. How did it all go to just her boobs? It was apparently upped two cup sizes if you saw her in that red dress, unrecognisable from the girl we saw in The Debt (2010).

Reminds me of:

Stephen King horror movie Thinner (1996), the last time so much fuss is kicked up over a piece of pie.

Amacam joker, berapa bintang lu mau kasi?

Overrated, overlong, overdone. If it were more like Forrest Gump (1994) and didn't take itself so seriously, then perhaps not many would've opposed it so badly. Reverse racism is so borin. Go and fry yourself some chicken instead to feel better about life.★★1/2