Thursday, 29 August 2013

Paranormal Whacktivity (2013)

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Paranormal Whacktivity (2013). Yep, you read that right.

The contraction of demon herpes.
At a glance:
If you watch a movie called Paranormal Whacktivity (2013) with a tagline that reads "Coming Too Soon", I think you have scarcely any right to complain about it. However, if you're a C-movie cinephile with the kind of self-loathin masochism to sit through films like 30 Nights Of Paranormal Activity With The Devil Inside The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo (2013), I'm sure you'd still be able to pick a bone or two. Anyway, it's a sex comedy as its title suggests and the synopsis reads: "A sexy and hilarious spoof about a couple who have just moved into a new home to consummate their relationship, but find peril around every corner due to an evil presence that haunts them whenever they attempt to be intimate." The script is penned by actor Chris Pentzell, who plays the psychic in the movie.
Bad news on the doorstep:
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Fake tits galore: The supple female casts give the movie its R rating.
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Iris Aldrete promises great cocksucking.
You could do a lot worse for somethin that's made on the cheap like this one, but it's still quite a test to finish it. Writers Chris Pentzell and Geoffrey Plitt do try to better the toilet humour we see in flicks like Scary Movie 5 (2013) but I guess there's only so much cock rings, salty garlic balls and discussions about demon semen one can take. Maybe if it had more known stars like in Movie 43 (2013) or if it went batshit OTT on the masturbation theme, things would've looked up a little. A movie called Paranormal Whacktivity begs to feature somethin more dramatically preposterous than midget demons and the herpes they contract.
Perennial wonderment:
Sure seems like a long time ago Oren Peli gave us the original Paranormal Activity (2007). How anyone can milk five straight sequels out of that is beyond me -- but I guess the spoofs must serve some market to keep bein produced.
Aneliese Roettger Chanel Ryan Melinda Y. Cohen Stephanie Danielson
I've always wanted to try this with my Chemistry teacher.
main belakang meatball analReminds me of:
The 500 Days Of Summer (2009) parody scene reminds me of the good times, when my ex-boss and I were still on talkin terms and we caught the Malaysian preview together.
Most memorable line:
"How can you expect me to be attracted to a man who can't even date rape me properly?"
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Pity the movie does have some respectably high production values -- it just desperately needed some actually funny gags. I don't remember a single giggle out of me. Well, at least we have buxom bikini model Sasha Formoso to thank for succeedin in draggin us to the finish line. By the way, can anyone tell me if Paranormal Parody (2009) was any better?
Bonus material:
Here's a collection of photos for you, taken from the official Paranormal Whacktivity Facebook fan page. Knock yourself out. Haha.

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William Patrick Riley and Sasho Formoso in Paranormal Whacktivity (2013).

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Actor Joseph Bakshandeh starring as a priest on the set of Paranormal Whacktivity.
Brianna Nicole working on voice-over at Sonic Magic Studios.
Alexander Schottky.
Writer Geoffrey Plitt taking a bath in Sangria. I want some of that!
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Producers Max Davids and Anthony Topman taking a break.
Amara Cash and Stephanie Danielson.